Fear of Sirsasana

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Photo by Hans Feurer for Vogue Paris 1977

It seems like everybody at my level can already do sirsasana but me. I know it’s not a competition, but it’s incredibly frustrating when everyone else can do it but you. My biggest challenge so far for sirsasana has been balance. I don’t know if it’s fear, although it possibly is, but it’s really hard to keep my legs straight in 180 degrees once I’m up. I can go, maybe around 170 degrees, really close to being straight but not quite there yet. Every time a teacher does help adjust my legs, I feel like I end up losing my balance. I also don’t know whether it’s a technique I’m missing (although I’ve tried all the suggestions) or if it’s simply my lack of awareness while I’m in that position. I’m sure I can do it by now, but the problem is trying to let go of that fear, which is hard in a position where you feel like you can potentially break your back.

There was a time though when I felt like I was doing it perfectly, but then again it’s really hard to know if it’s just through feeling rather than seeing. I was so confident in my salamba sarvangasana until I realised after filming myself that my back and my legs haven’t been so straight after all.

I guess there’s nothing to do but practice. I’m currently in supta padangusthasana which is already so. damn. close. to finishing the whole series that I just hope that I can master my sirsasana before I finally get to setu bandhasana. Constant practice is the only solution.

Photo courtesy of sunchasers.sunglasscurator.com

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